Tag Archives: 9 to 5

Passion: where can I get some of what you’ve got…

31 Mar

Two nights ago, I attended an event where my NLP instructor was speaking. Sometimes I need a refresher and it’s good to see my peeps. Afterward I spoke with a classmate, now friend, about her dwindling client base. She’s a physical trainer with an amazing physique and super outgoing personality. I’ve seen her in action so in my mind there is no doubt that she could have as many clients as she wanted. After talking for a few minutes she basically said her heart just wasn’t in it.

The next morning I was, for some unknown reason, thinking about my old job at the marketing firm. The office manager was surprised about my resignation and has asked me why many times since. Truly that list was very long and what I’m realizing is that new reasons have continued to come to my attention over the last 3 months since I left. The farther I get from the situation and the more I evolve in my own life philosophy, the more I see things I didn’t see before. A loss of passion for instance.

What I AM finding myself increasingly more passionate about however is this planet and the role I play in making it a better (or worse) place than I found it. I spent a LOT of time yestarday (probably 3+ hrs) having an internal dialogue about why I’m moving in the direction of more sustainable living. I use to do this when I had to think of log lines or a good synopses for a movie I was working on, or was practicing for a presentation, or formulating an elevator pitch for my business or that of a client. Going through as if you were being interviewed or having to explain something to someone who has no clue yields quite different results. It also reveals to me which are good reasons and which are superficial excuses.

For example, why I want to move: I pay half the rent & utilities but only use 30-40%  of the space (I never touch the living room) and dont care if I’m a bit chilly or sweaty so we would use less in utilities if it were up to me. This is a legitimate reason. I dont like other humans in my space 24/7 unless were dating, my landlord is incompitent and refuses to replace anything broken and I cant invite people over because this place is 40 years out of date and im embarrassed. These are all true yet not the most legitimate of reasons.

I really wanted to get to the bottom of it all…I examined my behavior, my preferences, phobias and vanities, tried my best to wade through my own bullshit, focus on my beliefs, what I could do without…it was quite enlightening and the results were great. Anyway, I’ll dive into it in my next post but before I go…one more word on passion.

I rejoined an old online dating/friending site this week and one of the compatibility questions caught my eye while I was sizing up a potential date.

Which makes for a better relationship? Passion or Dedication.

My answer was Dedication.  Most people my age opt for the prior but the site leaves a section where you can add an explanation if you are feeling like you need to make excuses for yourself…so I did.

“I believe in both/and, not either/or. That being said I think dedication can get you through the times where you lack passion more than passion can get you through times you lack dedication. You dig?”

After these last few days, feeling so passionate about some things, I’m seriously reexamining my answer. It’s certainly something to ponder.

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Long Time, No See

13 Feb

Lesson 1: 

After my last post I had a bit of a blog identity crisis. I kept thinking to myself “what am I saying about how I value my own life simply by having My Life Half Price as a title?!” Perhaps I was over-thinking it but I was in an NLP workshop at the time, hense the nature of the question. And it continued to be on my mind for a few months. So I stopped writing and put my 30 Day Discount Detox on pause…(I made it through 17 successful days as I recall). At this point I’ve adopted the view that the dollar amounts we assign to anything, to everything, simply do not matter.

At the time I was working a damn near full-time job that was paying me much less than minimum wage…don’t ask. Looking back I’d rather go back to being a construction worker. At least in those days I had a real paycheck that covered my expenses, I was in good shape and was home everyday by 4pm. That gives you a clue as to what I thought my time and work ethic was worth. And if you really think about it there are a ton of people working for less, 50, 60+  hours a week and still can’t pay the bills. The same went for my relationships. Moral of the story? Whether it’s a boss, a best friend or a spouse/partner if you aren’t getting back what you are putting in…leave. I left a lot of things last year.

Lesson 2: 

I had a realization: Los Angeles is FILLED with starving artists working with and trying to make money off of other starving artists. Does this make sense to you? Me neither. My mother who has her own business in addition to being a school administrator and goes to a members only “business cafe” most days after her 9-5. During my visit over the holidays I was there almost every day, all day. The amount of entrepreneurs and independent contractors that walk through that place is insane. And because it was in Maryland they have very little access, if any, to people like me.

There is an entire two-toned, boring, corporate world out there that could use the creative flare of individuals like myself. Not only could they use the help, but they need it and most importantly…they WANT it. I made more money in the value of my new relationships in those 2 weeks than I made in the entirety of 2011. The projects are starting to flow in, I’ve started a new business and was introduced to an awesome new video platform so I’m glad I made the investment of a plane ticket and my time. Moral of the story? Money will be exchanged either way. If you want ‘In’ make sure you get in the middle of that transaction.

Lesson 3:

Attack your fears, especially the inevitable, head on. If you have a credit card payment, got a parking ticket or owe money on your taxes…pay early. The longer you wait the more fees you’ll incur and you WILL forget. Why? because your unconscious mind wants to protect you from things that hurt. Paying stuff like bills and fees doesn’t typically feel good.

“Thanks unconscious mind. I appreciate you. Why don’t you go get us some drinks while I put this check in the mail.”

Now I will admit, in recent years I have not had this issue, thankfully, paying late or not paying attention can be very costly I learned very quickly after college and I make an effort to not go broke as a result of late fees and not moving my car on street sweeping days.

Recently it’s more in my dealing with work and people; friends, clients, etc. where I suffer the consequences of not being ‘on top’ of things. Not because I don’t know any better but because I’ve been avoidant, afraid, anxious, whatever you want to call it. So I’ve been making a point to make the first move: be the one to pick up the phone and dial when a difficult conversation has to be had, the one to write the email to the client who is completely avoidant after receiving the latest revision of an edit (if you are unhappy, SAY IT! and spare us all the suspense and wasted stress), and respond to a passive aggressive message…today, instead of tomorrow even though the contents made me want to punch a hole in the wall. Moral of the story? Growth is at the end of your comfort zone. Something I knew to be true previously and am learning more and more in an experiential sense everyday.

The more I focus on my money the more I learn about life. And this blog helps me reflect. That being said there is quite a bit of catching up to do so I will be posting regularly again starting…well, now.

-Half-price